


Every One Of Them's A Lie

by SkyFireForever



Category: The Mechanisms (Band)
Genre: Experimentation, Gen, Gun Violence, Manipulation, Minor Character Death, Misgendering, Murder, Trans Male Character, trans jonny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:34:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26864488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkyFireForever/pseuds/SkyFireForever
Summary: Written for the mechtober prompt: “Family”.Jonny remembers.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 60





	Every One Of Them's A Lie

**Author's Note:**

> This is sort of a companion piece to my fic "A Thousand-One Stories", but not really. It's more of a rewrite of that because I wasn't happy with it.

Jonny was laying on the table in Raphaella’s lab, squirming a bit uncomfortably. He didn’t exactly enjoy being experimented on, but he’d already agreed and didn’t want to back down. 

“Exactly how long will this take?” He grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Not long.” Raphaella assured him, attaching the strange helmet to his head. “Well, it might take awhile. It depends on how the experiment goes.” 

“Right.” He rolled his eyes. That didn’t help him at all. “Just make it as quick as possible.” 

“I will do my best.” She told him. “Now, be still.” 

Jonny tried, but his ADHD didn’t like it when he was still. It didn’t like it at all. He fidgeted a bit with his sleeves, but tried to keep the rest of his body as still as possible. He sighed, staring up at the ceiling, which had those glow in the dark stars stuck to it. 

“What exactly did you say this experiment was for again?” 

“I didn’t say.” Raphaella responded. 

“Oh, great.” Why did he agree to an experiment when he didn’t know what it was? Stupid decision. 

“Now, you’re going to fall unconscious in a few seconds.” She told him. “There may be slight pain.” 

“When you say slight pain, do you mean-” He was cut off by a searing pain through his brain. His vision blacked out and then he was fading. 

Everything was blurry. He could just barely make out the figure of a little girl on a swing set. She laughed loudly with each swing, her long, brown hair done in two braids. She seemed to be enjoying herself. 

It took him another moment to realize that the little girl wasn’t a girl at all. It was  _ him.  _ The blue dress sparked something within him and he remembered. 

He’d always hated that dress. 

But since when did he remember wearing that dress as a child? Since when did he remember  _ being  _ a child? 

He didn’t understand. This was his memory, but he couldn’t remember it. 

A name was being called. A name that made him want to recoil and hide away. A name that had once belonged to him, but had never been  _ his.  _

The girl who wasn’t really a girl stopped in her swinging. She got off of the swing and stood up. 

“Coming, Mother!” She called before running towards the small house that Jonny had just noticed. 

The house was familiar. 

He got flashes of home cooked meals and dancing in the kitchen. Of card games being played in the den. Of laughter and warmth. 

He followed the girl who wasn’t really a girl inside. 

“Look at you!” A woman spoke, looking down at the young not-girl. “You’ve got mud on your dress.” 

There was mud upon the dress. Mud that hadn’t been there when she was swinging. This was a different time. 

The woman was familiar and filled Jonny with a sense of longing. She had dark hair and even darker eyes. She was beautiful. Why did he want to cry upon seeing her?

“Well, I’ll have to make you a new dress, now won’t I?” She sighed. “Go change and wash up for supper.” 

The girl who wasn’t a girl left to do so. 

The scene shifted. 

The not-girl was sitting around a table with the woman to her right and a man to her left. They each held a handful of cards. The child was laughing, delight in her eyes. 

“I beat you, Father.” She showed her cards right after the man did.

“So you did.” The man chuckled. “That’s my girl.” 

And then the scene shifted again. 

Little Jonny coming home from school, still wearing that blue dress. 

There was blood in the carpet. 

In the living room, the man standing over the body of the woman, a gun in hand as he turned to face the girl who wasn’t a girl. 

Then everything went fuzzy. 

Then the scene came back into focus and the person Jonny recognized as himself was older, not a not-girl anymore, but a boy. A boy becoming a man. 

The man from previous scenes sat at the table, reading a newspaper. “I was thinking you could come with me to the casino tonight, son.” He said. “We could have a good time.” 

“I’d like that, Father.” The boy said. 

“That’s my boy.” He ruffled his hair. 

More fuzziness. Shapes. Voices. A voice he could recognize. Carmilla’s. 

“You deserve to be free of that fear.” She was saying. “You deserve a family who will love you.” 

The sound of a gunshot. 

Apologies coming from his own lips. 

“I forgive you, son.” A memory that had stuck with him. “I’m sorry too.” A sentence long forgotten. 

And all at once, everything clicked. 

Memory after memory went shooting through Jonny’s brain. 

He remembered his mother holding him close after a nightmare, singing him a lullaby. He remembered her sewing him clothes, including the blue dress he wore when he found her dead in the living room. 

He remembered his father crying, apologizing for the crime of murdering his wife. 

He remembered saying he forgave him, but he never really did. 

He remembered coming out to his father, remembered the acceptance with which he had been received. He remembered choosing his name with help from his father. 

He remembered  _ loving  _ his father despite everything. 

He remembered Doctor Carmilla. The woman who told him that he deserved a better family, one that wasn’t as stained with blood. 

She had promised to be a mother to him, to help fill the hole that his own mother had left behind.

He remembered pulling the trigger and watching his father fall. 

He remembered apologizing. 

He remembered his father’s forgiveness. 

He remembered everything. 

His eyes opened and he sat up, breathing heavily in Raphaella’s lab once again. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to will the memories away. 

“Did it work?” Raphaella was questioning him. “What do you remember?”

“Make me forget.” He ordered through gritted teeth. 

“What?” 

“Make me forget again.” He gripped at his hair. “Take the memories away. Take them away.” 

“But we just unlocked them! We can’t just-”

“Make me forget.” He looked at her with wide eyes. “Please.” 

She paused, hesitating for just a moment before nodding. She put him back under and when he awoke, the memories were gone. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me what you thought of this!


End file.
